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الخميس، 22 أكتوبر 2015

الخميس، 22 أكتوبر 2015

Written Expressions 3rd Year Classes topic 77-87

Written Expressions 3rd Year Classes
Unit Six: Keep cool!
Topic77:

We have multiple ways to express our feelings, and profanity tends to leak out when we most need to do so.
Discuss.

Typical Essay:
  Though it is common to hear profanity virtually everywhere, it is still possible to learn how not to use it.
Profanity is actually a fairly limited language, which can offend or hurt people’s feelings. In addition, profanity
is often picked up by the small children around whom it is used. Using profanity is a breakable habit that may
be helped by a few tips.
  First, consider our language. We have multiple ways to express our feelings, and profanity tends to leak out
when we most need to express our feelings. One helpful way to break from using profanity is to arm oneself
with an emotional language. “That hurts my feelings,” “I am really angry,” or “I feel frustrated.” “I’m tired,” or “I’m
impatient and cross.”
  The more we learn our own language, the more ways we have to actually express our own feelings without
resorting to profanity. Especially since one has so many other ways one can “use our words,” avoiding
profanity may actually allow us to express how one truly feels. In front of children, this type of expression is
very helpful, because it teaches them the emotional language they will need to cope with difficult situations or
challenging feelings.
  Another tool for helping to avoid slips of the tongue is to always use language that one would use with either
a young person, or someone elderly. If dear grandma were in the room, would one really choose the s or f-
word? If a young niece or nephew was over and one stepped on a toy, would one let out an offensive
exclamation? Consider that in public, someone’s dear old grandma or sweet child may be nearby.
  If one does slip, say what one should have said. It helps to get in the habit of saying the words that don’t
offend. Also, apologize for a word slip in a public venue. Recognize this behavior as potentially harmful or
offensive and own one’s mistakes. Apologizing can be a healthy way to remind one that such language is
now off limits.
  Another method some find helpful is the profanity fine. If one slips and says a word, impose a reasonable
fine. For teens, this could be a quarter, and for adults perhaps a dollar. Donate the money to one’s church or
to a charity.
  Some new parents substitute nonsense words for profanity, and this may be helpful. Another technique is to
actually let out a bleep or buzz sound as would occur on television. Censoring oneself can be a good initial
step toward moving onto more inventive words.
  Some might argue that about the only acceptable time to use profanity is if one is acting in a part that
requires such. At other times, the richness of the English language offers many words that are far more
expressive of true feelings. Though this may be a difficult habit to break if one uses profanity frequently, it is
not impossible. While profanity is often called “colorful,” truly colorful language expresses one’s varied
vocabulary and ability as a speaker.

Topic78:

To show empathy is to identify with another's feelings and emotionally put yourself in his place. Discuss.

Typical Essay:
  Empathy is a feeling different from sympathy. When one is sympathetic, one implies pity but maintains
distance from another person’s feelings. Empathy is more a sense that one can truly understand or imagine
the depth of another person’s feelings. It implies feeling with a person, rather than feeling sorry for a person.
  Empathy is a translation of the German term Einfühlung, meaning to feel as one with. It implies sharing the
load, or “walking a mile in someone else’s shoes,” in order to appropriately understand that person’s
perspective.
  In therapy, for example, being sympathetic with a patient implies a distance and a failure to understand the
patient’s viewpoint. On the other hand, the therapist who displays empathy is attempting to further his or her
understanding from the perspective of the patient. This implies closeness rather than distance as it makes
little distinction between the person suffering and the person attempting to understand the suffering. However,
the therapist must also protect him or herself from becoming entangled in the emotional state of the client.
Some distance needs to be maintained even when empathy is practiced.
  Group therapy often works because those with a specific issue, such as alcoholism, are able to show
empathy to each other. Each person who is an alcoholic finds it easier to understand others who struggle with
alcoholism.
  Alternately, a group dedicated to providing support to people that have lost a child relies on the empathy of
the members. Each person has something in common with the other group members. They can all deeply
understand the monumental importance and tragedy of losing a child in a way that cannot be understood by a
person who has not lost a child.
  Often people who have suffered a loss or experienced a tragedy find themselves put off by sympathy.
Sympathy often emphasizes that the grieving person is alone. Even when kindly meant, sympathy is often
rejected. Grieving people don’t necessarily want pity, but instead want understanding. Finding friends who
can offer empathy helps to restore perspective in a world that has been torn by tragedy. It emphasizes that
one is not alone, and shares his or her intense feelings with other people.
  For those who truly wish to help a grieving person, empathy is not always possible. Most people cannot
even begin to be “as one with” a person who has been raped, abused, or who has suffered the death of a
loved one. However, in attempting to express empathy, one needs to think carefully. “What would this really
be like?” Sometimes the only appropriate response is to say to a person: “I can only imagine how difficult this
must be for you.” In this way, we come closest to empathy.

Topic79:

What creates a sense of happiness can vary widely from person to person. Discuss.

Typical Essay:
    A number of small positive events or accomplishments accumulate to provide a sense of self-satisfaction
and contentment, which we interpret as personal happiness. For most of us, happiness is a state of mind
rather than a specific emotion or response to positive outside forces.
  One important element of happiness is a sense of self-satisfaction. Whether or not we want to admit it, many
of us spend our days in a perpetual state of neediness. We have physical, emotional and spiritual needs
which we believe need to be satisfied in order to experience some degree of happiness. When we have that
morning cup of coffee, socialize with co-workers, enjoy a delicious lunch or finish an important project, at
least one of our daily needs will be met. In one sense, happiness occurs when our list of needs becomes
replaced by a new list of physical, emotional and spiritual fulfillment.
  Another important element of happiness is a sense of accomplishment. Consider how many times our ideas
and plans fail throughout an average day. These failures tend to create inner tension and anxiety, which in turn
creates a sense of unhappiness. But when an idea does come to fruition or a plan does come together, there
is often a feeling of euphoria and accomplishment. Happiness can be the reward for persevering through
difficult or challenging times and not succumbing to despair. Winning a contest or receiving recognition for a
successful project often triggers feelings of happiness.
  For some of us, happiness can be derived from having our material or spiritual needs met. There is an old
saying that money can't buy happiness, but in reality it can come very close. For many wage earners, the
thought of receiving enough money or other tangible rewards for their efforts can certainly trigger a sense of
happiness. Knowing that our immediate needs and even a few personal desires will be met can be very
reassuring, which in turn generates feelings of security and happiness. In the same sense, many people find
happiness after hearing a life-affirming spiritual message or spending time in deep reflection or meditation.
Happiness could mean a sense of harmony between mind, body and spirit.
  What creates a sense of happiness can vary widely from person to person. Young children with little life
experience may find happiness in the form of an ice cream cone or Saturday morning cartoon, while adults
may find happiness by traveling or pursuing outside interests. Some people require a lot of their needs to be
met before they experience happiness, while others find happiness in simplicity. Happiness is said to be the
one free thing all people strive for and would give anything to obtain.

Topic80:

Children often want to know what it means to die but this would be problematic to many parents. Discuss.

Typical Essay:
  It is unlikely that a child will make it through childhood without experiencing the death of a friend. When the
death of a friend is unexpected, it can be challenging to break the news to a child. A very young child, who
has never experience the death of a friend, pet or loved one, may not know how to react to such news.
  Children often want to know what it means to die. For young children, this may mean explaining that
physically, death is a process where the body stops working. Using euphemisms like passing on or went to
sleep are not recommended, as they may cause the child to have concerns that they might accidentally die in
their sleep. Children may also want to know what happens to a body after someone dies. In fact they may ask
questions that can shock a parent. It’s considered best to treat such questions with accurate but simple facts.
  Even with an explanation, after the death of a friend, children may not be able to grasp that a friend is really
gone. If the family believes in some form of afterlife, this can prove comforting or perplexing. Children that
believe in God may find themselves wondering why God caused the death of a friend. There is no one good
way to approach this, except to assure the child that he or she is safe.
  It can help to consult other parents or a grief counselor if you feel unable to answer your child’s questions.
Grief counselors can help one navigate parenting through this tragic experience. When necessary, a child
may benefit from some individual grief counseling or play therapy as well.
  Older children may react differently to a death of a friend than a younger child. In fact teens often don’t want
to discuss their feelings with parents. They may feel more comfortable discussing their thoughts with their
peers. When the death of a friend is felt by a school community, for example, schools are often excellent at
providing grief counseling and support to the students in the challenging months ahead.
  Some parents feel that they shouldn’t show their own emotions about the death of a friend to children.
However, psychologists often feel this is a mistake. While overblown screaming and crying might make the
child worried, natural tears and feeling sad in front of child may help him or her understand they too can cry or
feel sad. Parents and friends teach a lifelong lesson about how people grieve when they encounter the death
of a friend. Responding with no emotion may well teach the child that emotional reaction is unacceptable.
Topic81:

Children often want to know what it means to die but this would be problematic to many parents. Discuss.

Typical Essay:
  To put it in very simple terms, tolerance means to tolerate or put up with differences. It means showing
respect for the race, religion, age, gender, opinions, and ideologies of other people or groups. Tolerance
means different things to different people. It is when something is disagreeable that tolerance is expected,
and in more politically correct cultures, demanded.
  Tolerance can be shown in many ways. A person might fully disagree with others on any issue, while at the
same time respecting those with different opinions and treating them with dignity and respect. Disagreement
alone does not equal intolerance.
  One problem is the fact that tolerance is sometimes one-sided. Those who disagree with a particular issue
must respect the opinions of those who advocate it, but some advocates feel justified in labeling those who
disagree with hateful terms, and vice versa. People on both sides of an issue must be tolerant of each other,
in order for tolerance to be effective.
  When it comes to controversial issues, tolerance may also represent a “let’s agree to disagree” stance. It
does not mean that a person has to accept or embrace words, actions, or ideas that are against his or her
values or beliefs. It simply means that each person agrees to respect the other’s right to his or her feelings on
the matter. When both parties have expressed their opinions, and it is obvious that neither is likely to change
position, agreeing to disagree is often the most amicable outcome.
  Some degree of tolerance is necessary in any civilized society, but it is not realistic to believe that all people
can achieve complete tolerance on every issue. It goes against human nature, or the instinctive impulse of
some to pull away from people or things that are different or unknown. Tolerance is a learned attribute, a
virtue, which requires honest effort on the part of every person. It takes time to develop real tolerance, and it
also takes commitment.


Topic82:

Love is said to have different languages. Discuss.

Typical Essay
  Dr. Gary Chapman, a Christian family counselor <http://www.wisegeek.com/what-is-a-counselor.htm> and
author, has developed a relationship-building program called the 5 love languages. Love languages are
defined as verbal and non-verbal communications between couples which improve the mental and physical
well-being of both partners. These mutual expressions and actions help to build up a nurturing environment in
which couples can improve both their emotional and physical intimacy levels.
  The first of the five love languages includes words of affirmation. These words go far beyond a perfunctory "I
love you" ritual, and include specific recognition of a partner's contributions to the relationship or the
household or a career. The point of the exercise is to provide enough positive affirmation of a partner's self-
worth to motivate that person towards even more personal growth. By telling a partner or friend or co-worker
how much you appreciate his or her efforts, you are speaking in a language he or she can understand.
  The second of the five love languages involves spending quality time with a loved one. This means setting
aside a meaningful amount of personal time in which the friend or partner receives your complete and
undivided attention. The idea is to have substantial conversations with another person, or take the time to
indulge in a mutual interest, such as a movie or a hobby. Quality time can build up intimacy and trust in any
relationship, romantic or otherwise.
  Receiving gifts is the third component of Chapman's love languages. Almost everyone enjoys receiving
personalized gifts from loved ones, and a surprise gift can be even more special. The ritual surrounding the
presentation of a gift is often as satisfying as the gift itself. Some gifts are not necessarily tangible, but a
spouse or friend can contribute a gift of time or a gift of their unique talents.
  The fourth of the five love languages involves acts of service. A partner may volunteer to clean the house
before the other partner returns home from work. A husband may decide to convert a garage into a craft
room so his wife can pursue her interests and hobbies. The most important idea behind an act of services is
that it must be unconditional and free of ulterior motives. A quid pro quo arrangement is not considered a true
act of service.
  The final element of the five love languages is physical touch.  A back rub following a hard day at work would
be an example of a positive expression of love language. A spouse may spontaneously scratch the other's
back, or a father may give his son an affectionate pat on the shoulder after a good sports play. The point of
physical touch is to satisfy the basic human need for close contact with others. People who feel isolated from
others physically may begin to feel isolated on other levels as well.


Topic83:

Roses are often messengers of various feelings and emotions. Discuss what the different colours of roses
can signify.

Typical Essay
  Roses are the ultimate flower for expression of emotion or feeling. As a gift, roses can convey different
meanings if the person receiving them knows the symbolism attached to the various colors of roses. Over the
years, the meanings behind the different colors of roses have evolved to cover many sentiments. Before
ordering a bouquet of roses for delivery, or to interpret possible meaning behind the last bouquet of roses
you received, read on to learn the meanings associated with many common colors of roses.
  Red is the most commonly given color of roses. Red signifies love and passion. True red is the rose for
lovers. Fiery red roses signify passion, while cardinal red symbolizes desire. Fully bloomed red roses best
convey the message “I still love you,” while red rose buds are a way to express love for the first time.
  Yellow roses once meant jealousy, but today the yellow rose signifies friendship, familiar love, and domestic
happiness. Yellow roses can also be an appropriate sentiment to express sympathy. Orange roses
symbolize an expression of pride or amazement, while peach roses symbolize appreciation and desire. A
bouquet of orange roses would be appropriate for a graduate or to commemorate a promotion, while peach
could express sincere appreciation for someone’s accomplishments.
  Pink roses signify elegance, gentility, and poetic romance, without the seriousness signified by red. Pink
roses are more light-hearted than red and can signify mere admiration or sweetness of thought. Light pink
roses can signify both sympathy and friendship, while dark pink is symbolic of appreciation and thankfulness.
A mixture of pink and red roses signifies a romantic relationship.
  White roses are sometimes called the “flower of light” and are the bride’s roses. They symbolize unity,
sincerity, loyalty, purity, and a love stronger than death. White roses can be mixed with red to emphasize the
meaning of love, while white rose buds are an appropriate gift to a young girl from her father.
  Purple roses represent majestic glory and can symbolize eternal love, while lavender or lilac roses signify
love at first sight or the beginning of true feelings. Purple roses are appropriate for wedding anniversaries
beyond 25 years and as memorial flowers for a lost spouse. Deep purple roses should be reserved for
intimate situations.
  Black roses are symbolic of death. Many people view black roses as an omen, but they can signify change
or rejuvenation on the horizon, as some rose buds appear black but then bloom into crimson red. The
meaning of black roses may not be understood or well received as a gift, so you should avoid this color if you
are at all unsure of the recipient’s beliefs.
  Many colors of roses come in various shades, which can signify slightly different meanings from their
primary colors. Mixing different colors together in one bouquet is an excellent way to convey a mixture of
emotions when one sentiment is not enough.

Topic84:

Chivalry was a code for a certain small class of society. Discuss.

Typical Essay
  Chivalry in its modern sense tends to apply to the courtesies a man might pay to a lady. These include
standing until a woman sits, offering a woman a seat on a bus, or opening a door for a woman. These actions
are the remains of the once great code for knightly behavior espoused during the Middle Ages.
  Simply riding on horseback, however, is not an example of chivalry. In fact the term implies not only the
knight, but also the duties of a good knight. These duties were defined as faithfulness and service to God,
kindliness to fellow Christians, protection and championship of the weak, and courtly love.
  Women and men might “play” at courtly love, because in most instances, marriage was a contractual
obligation, and not a match made because of love. Gentle behavior, and elaborate praise of the woman
helped to satisfy a deep yearning to be admired and appreciated, something not always obtainable from a
husband.
  As well, a younger knight might act as champion for a woman with an older husband, who did not have the
strength to bear her colors in jousting tournaments. This aspect of chivalry was seen as the attention due to
women, and not a chance to gain a woman sexually. In fact, by following church teachings as part of chivalry,
adultery verges off the path of the chivalrous.
  All aspects of chivalry are guided by a knight’s service to honor. Personal worth was measured by
adherence to chivalry, and by not simply being chivalrous when others were around to observe it. Chivalry
was meant to guide the knight through situations where he was alone; it gave him a chance to act for the
salvation of his soul and for the salvation of others.
  Naturally one must contrast chivalry with the outrageous and barbaric behavior often in keeping with the
feudal system and the crusades. Since chivalry is conducted as a Christian code, it did not apply to the
“infidel” such as Jews, or Turks, killed during crusades. Nor did chivalry apply to the abuse frequently inflicted
on serfs, though in Arthurian legends, much chivalry was practiced to punish feudal lords who abused their
serfs, as part of the protection of the weak.
  However, chivalry was a code for a certain small strata of society. As such, chivalrous behavior could
separate the knight from the masses rather than have him work for the many poor and abused in the feudal
society.
Topic85:

There are many ways for a man to be a better husband and overcome his family problems. Discuss.

Typical Essay
  Marriage is the joining of two people in a bond meant to last a lifetime. Unfortunately, as evidenced by the
rising divorce rates, this is not always how it goes. Marriages can fall apart for many reasons, and it is usually
the fault of both people involved. However, by trying to be a better husband, you can possibly save a marriage
heading down a rocky road, or improve an already strong relationship.
  The first way to be a better husband is to rekindle the romance. This is not as difficult as it may sound. Start
small, especially if it’s been a while. Bring home some flowers, and hold doors open for your wife. Show her
through little things that you love and admire her. Hold hands again, and cuddle on the couch while watching a
movie. If you can afford gifts to show your affection, that’s fine, but most women would prefer that their
husbands spend more time than money on them.
  Learning to spend more time together is important when trying to be a better husband. Make time for each
other, a few hours every week, at the very least. If you can carve out even a half hour of time a day, just for the
two of you, that is even better. Schedule regular date nights, without the kids. In addition, take an active
interest in your wife’s hobbies. If she loves to cook, sign yourselves up for some cooking classes. Spending
time together doing something that she really enjoys can make your marriage stronger.
  Take the time to talk things out, since communication is essential to a great marriage. To be a better
husband, you must be willing to listen. This is especially important when there is an argument. Learn to fight
fair, and listen to each other's concerns. If communication is difficult for you and your wife, consider marriage
counseling, as a counselor can help you both learn to better relate to each other. Listening in a non-
judgmental way, and learning to phrase complaints in a loving way, can solve a lot of the problems that most
marriages face.
  There are many ways to be a better husband. The best way is to remember why you fell in love in the first
place. At the beginning of your relationship, you were each other's best friend, and considerate of each
other’s feelings and opinions. As a marriage goes on, it is easy to lose sight of this. As you try to become a
better husband, there is a very good possibility that your wife will respond to your efforts and become a better
wife.


Topic86:

There are many ways for a woman to be a better wife and overcome her family problems. Discuss.

Typical Essay
  A great way to improve a marriage is to try to be a better wife. It isn’t hard to be a better wife, and it is often
worth it to put a little extra effort into a relationship to keep it strong. Being a better wife can have a great pay-
off, improving your marriage and helping you to rediscover the spark enjoyed in the earlier stages of the
relationship.
  One of the best ways to be a better wife is to be conscientious of how you phrase requests. Don’t be a nag.
State your request in a respectful way, and then let it go. Remember that your husband is an adult, and treat
him as such. Asking nicely is a better way to get what you want, and it will leave him in a more pleasant mood
and more receptive to future requests.
  Another terrific way to become a better wife is to learn how to fight fairly. Slamming doors and name calling
are not conducive to a strong relationship. Communication is an essential skill for married couples to have.
Being able to voice your concerns and opinions in a mature way, and knowing that you are being heard and
understood, is important for any relationship, but it is especially important in marriages.
  Forgive and forget. This seems basic, but it can be very difficult to let go of a grudge, especially when you
feel you have been wronged. Accept the apology, and move on. Everybody makes mistakes, sometimes bad
ones. Harboring feelings of resentment is toxic for both your relationship and your happiness. Being a better
wife may mean learning to be a better person.
  Another way to be a better wife is to give your husband time to himself. This means different things for
different men. Some men would love time to go golfing. Others would love to have a chance to go out with the
guys, have a couple hours of uninterrupted video game time, or just be able to watch a football game in
peace. By granting your husband this time to himself, you will be showing him that you understand his needs,
and that you care. In return, it might be easier for you to slip out for a few hours, leaving him to watch the
children while you have some personal time of your own.
  Marriages are a partnership. It takes two people to make a marriage work, and it takes two people to ruin it.
By doing your best to be a better wife, you may inspire your husband to try a little harder, too. Giving
yourselves the gift of a solid relationship is more than worth any extra effort it may require.


Topic87:

No matter how much you love the area in which you live or how much you love your home, having an annoying
neighbour can take away from your pleasure. Discuss what one can do with an troublesome neighbour.

Typical Essay
  No matter how much you love the area in which you live or how much you love your home, having an
annoying neighbour can take away from your pleasure. While it is often best to try to ignore minor or
infrequent annoyances, that isn’t always possible with a particularly annoying neighbor. You may eventually
have to confront the person who is keeping you from enjoying your home or yard.
  If the transgression isn’t extreme but is still a nuisance or an inconvenient disturbance, consider
approaching the annoying neighbour in a friendly manner. Invite him or her over for coffee, and attempt to
discuss your complaint in a gentle way. In some cases, the person may not even be aware that his habits are
bothersome.
  A good example is a neighbour that mows his lawn late in the evening while you’re children are trying to
sleep. It may be that he only wishes to cut grass when it’s not so hot outside, and he may not be aware of your
children’s bedtime. Once aware, he may simply agree to mow earlier, and you will have settled the difference
and may even end up liking your once annoying neighbor.
  There are however some worse situations as well. If your annoying neighbour encroaches on your property,
doesn’t maintain the home or yard appropriately, or does other things that could decrease your property
value, you may have to call the appropriate agency to lodge a complaint if your neighbour fails to act after
being asked to take care of the situation.
  You may also find yourself living beside the kind of annoying neighbor that creates real problems. He or she
might throw parties or play loud music, fight loudly with a boyfriend or girlfriend, drive too fast up and down the
street, or engage in any number of inappropriate behaviors. The best way to approach this type of person is
to avoid the heat of the moment confrontation. Don’t storm over to the annoying neighbour’s home while angry
and while or while the person is drinking.
  Problem neighbours can sometimes be dangerous, and you don’t want to find yourself in the middle of a
physical altercation. You might approach the annoying neighbour at another time to ask for some
consideration. You may also find that you have no choice but to call the police if the problems persist. This
won’t help your relationship with your neighbour, so you might consider making the report anonymously.
However, it may help quiet things down.



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